I have decided to remain anonymous to shield my identity from the embarrassment. The previous night, I got hungry and decided to make some ramen. I removed the various packets from the bowl, added the seasoning and vegetables, then put the bowl in the microwave. After about a minute or two, I realized something was wrong. A terrible burning smell had filled my kitchen. I opened the door to my microwave and…lo and behold…I had neglected to add water. There was some smoke rising from the bowl. Not wanting to discard the ramen, I went to the sink and poured in water, which engulfed the room with acrid smoke for several seconds. I then put the bowl back in the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. Well…It went okay for a little while, until I discovered a mass of blackened noodles which had become some sort of strange crystalline substance never before seen. I had a change of mind.